Saturday, February 13, 2016

Life at 25

Hi, I'm 25. Firstly I'm not sure if I should post in /r/foreveralone, /r/introvert or /r/mental. To an extent, I'm not sure where my loneliness arrives from -- environmental (the utter non-existence of "asian bros" growing up) or just being withdrawn to the internet of minor subcultures.
I am employed (although not in a career-- because I), have a bachelors (in science and not business/engineering/CS), and (not because I) drive a car. I have a passion for the arts: I listen to synthpop like Grimes/Sky Ferreria/Beach House/FKA Twigs/Neon Indian/Crystal Castles/Jamie XX/Twin Shadow/Washed Out/Toro Y Moi/Chairlift. I draw-sketch studies whenever I need to relieve stress. I have a noted preference in food -- growing up in a Cantonese-Vietnamese household meant I was exposed to many sorts of foods and learning to cook well is something I would like to learn from my family. I would love to dress well. I would love traveling because being in aesthetic urban environments reinvigorates me (San Francisco, Boston, Vancouver, DTLA/Pasadena).
I generalize. I am opinionated. You would know, or you wouldn't. Sardonic? I don't know. I am trying to become more optimistic in life. Maybe it can, maybe it can't change. At the end of it all, I will put my honest effort to do the best I can, continually think of improvement and remain true to my word.
Goals:
There's a number at hand, and primarily that's to find a career which I can afford time for myself. I need to read again, but I'm tired of great book classics in academia -- something like modern non-fiction, genre fiction, a Hemingway, or something recommended off of Fresh Air (distributed by NPR) can suck me back in instead. I don't know, I need to start using my library card again. I need to run. I used to have the guts to run. Run to clear my head, -- I'm scared or I've just become out of it now. Exercise has been something I've not been able to become regular at. I've been extremely skinny or just moderate weight -- nothing /fit/. I need to control my anxiety.
I am not afraid to talk to strangers -- it's just that holding conversations in the future is challenging.

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